Бєєfactory

星期五

这首歌使我想起了你…你近来好吗？工作如何？嗯，email问候你就好了，我在犹豫什么呢？

The little things you do to me are taking me over,
i wanna show you,
everything inside of me are like a nervous heart that is crazy beating…

曾经有这样的感觉…

星期六

你竟然online!?! 这是第一个惊喜，因为你说那儿很可能没有internet connection，所以我也不expect to meet u online.

他 ：where were u when i miss u??

then bla bla bla

他 ：and u didn’t even miss me

bla bla bla bla

他 ：01xxxxxxxx. u’re not allow to say that (me not having his number, hence not able to sms him) anymore

bla bla bla bla bla

他 ：so am i you current (bf)?

傻眼掉！他在那晚说了很多…奇怪的话，18sx的也有！sexual harrasment wey! 应该是累坏了吧！怎么有可能想念我，because of your work you are surrounded by美女: hannah tan, carmen soo and daphne iking leh!

anyway, i know you guys are expecting me to blog about my Beijing trip, LOL. sorry, got distracted! blame it on him!

i dreamt of me and my supervisor going somewhere for recording purpose, then when he is done parking his car, i was running down the stairs holding that guy’s hand from 1st floor to ground floor then ran up to the 2nd floor all these running was just to find a better parking spot. Then we went into the shopping complex to find my supervisor, when we spotted him, i quickly let go of that guy’s hand, was afraid that my supervisor would be jealous mad at me. Strangely, my school mates were there also, they were teasing that guy and me *blush* how in the world do my schoolmates know him la?!

well, yea, i know all of you will go “HUH???” or “HAH???” or maybe “HEH???” it’s such a weird and confusing dream, i know… this dream is as bizarre as the smses i got from a friend yesterday night.

to my friend, i have never pushed you away, not intentionally, was doing it cheekily (eh? no such word, i think, but i trust that you get it) , what is it that you don’t understand about me? i wish you would just ask me about the things you don’t understand about me instead of saying “I don’t understand you”; “I don’t understand girls like you” and “I wish i can see what you are thinking”. if you try asking, i can try to give u an explanation, that would certainly make both us feel better, no? Our mutual understanding of each other is still very much lacking, that is an undeniable truth as we have known each other for merely 2 weeks! and i never realized that i have such an impact on ur life… cos you said so!

I have been thinking hard, trying to figure out what your smses meant, believe me, it was the last thing on my mind when i slept and the very first thing that came to mind when i opened my eyes this morning. I have been thinking about it almost every other minute, (boy, it is an effective way to make me think of you the whole day!) non-stop thinking about it, it is on my mind when I am eating, bathing, doing house chores and even when I am writing my thesis! Gosh~ it’s driving me crazy, please spare me the pain of thinking (u know how much i dislike thinking, the more i think, the more complicated things will be), let me keep my sanity, please just tell/ask me directly what is it that you dont understand about me…

i remember those smses ”with a surge of that well-known sadness”…  my mood now is same as the mood of the MAMA MIA sountrack ”slipping throught my fingers”

Don’t know why, but am feeling sad~ it feels like i m losing this friend pretty soon,  i think he is going to be one of my many friends that “came and then left” my life…